


standing in the ashes of who i used to be

by MomtherSeries



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: :D, Angst with a Happy Ending, Graphic illness described, Hurt/Comfort, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:14:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26593525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MomtherSeries/pseuds/MomtherSeries
Summary: Grian couldn’t pinpoint when the changes had started, but he could pinpoint when they got out of hand.(written for @mine-sara-sp ‘s redstone!au on tumblr)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 197





	standing in the ashes of who i used to be

**Author's Note:**

> written for @mine-sara-sp ‘s redstone au on tumblr. Go check her out!

Grian couldn’t pinpoint when the changes had started, but he could pinpoint when they got out of hand. 

It was a Sahara meeting, as always. It really wasn’t much of a meeting. Iskall and Mumbo were doing some sort of redstone with the sorting system, and Grian was hunched over his notebook, planning rooms for his Haunted Mansion mini-game.

“God _damn it_!” Iskall cursed and kicked a repeater across the room, shattering the comfortable silence. Mumbo and Grian both jumped.

“Dude,” Grian said, placing his pencil down. “Do you want to take a breather?” 

Iskall inhaled sharply, covering his face for a moment before nodding. “Yeah. That’d be good. I’m not sure what it is lately, but redstone has been making me _super_ angry.”

“Oh, that’s weird,” Mumbo said. “Every time something goes wrong for me I cry. I’ve never cried over redstone before, but this week I’ve lost it a few times.”

“Huh,” Grian said, frowning. Xisuma had been acting weird too- more apathetic then normal. “Maybe it’s something to do with the redstone? I feel fine, but I don’t use redstone.”

Iskall snorted dismissively. “That’s stupid. The redstone is fine.”

Grian hummed. “You’re probably right, I’m just being silly.”

\--

Grian didn’t think it was silly when he found Mumbo a few days later weeping over a circuit that didn’t work. 

He didn’t think it was silly when Iskall accidently punched a hole in Sahara Now’s wall because a shulker box didn’t load.

Or when Doc gave him an empty look when Grian was asking him about his guardian farm.

When Xisuma brushed off his worries with a dismissive wave of his hand and a “go bother someone else about it.”

Grian didn’t think it was silly at all when he stole every piece of redstone from every circuit, every chest, every shulker box and hid them where no one would find them.

\--

Grian sat on the ground in Sahara anxiously, awaiting the confrontation. He coughed harshly into his elbow, his lungs aching. It had been three days since he hid all the redstone. He had been up every night, stealing the pieces that had been mined. Hermit’s were growing angry. He couldn’t stop coughing. 

Iskall was the first to arrive, storming into Sahara with a scowl. Mumbo was a close second, already wiping away tears. Grian watched them approach. 

“Grian!” Iskall shouted. “Where’d you put it?”

“I can’t tell you,” Grian whispered. Any louder and it’d throw him into another coughing fit. They were getting longer by the minute.

“Where the _fuck_ is it?” Iskall snarled again, grabbing Grian by the collar of his shirt and shoving him against the wall. The movement made Grian dizzy.

“I can’t-“

“ ** _TELL ME.”_**

****

“Iskall you’re hurting him-“ Mumbo cried out, a sob breaking his sentence.

“I CAN’T TELL YOU!“ Grian shouted back, before dissolving into coughing. Iskall dropped him, and Grian hit the floor, curling into a ball, unable to catch his breath. Tears streamed from his eyes, and he couldn’t breathe or see and he w _as choking he couldn’t b r e a t h e **the coughing wouldn’t stop why can’t it stop he can’t breathe he c a n ‘ t –**_

****

\--

Grian was bedridden. It had been three weeks since he hid all the redstone. He hadn’t stolen any for a week now, he was too sick. Dizzy when he stood, coughing non-stop and vomiting. Grian was pretty sure he had inhaled redstone. He told himself the red he was coughing was blood. It was nicer to think it was that then the alternative. 

Iskall had killed him twice in an effort to find the redstone. Xisuma killed him once, too. He had threatened to ban Grian. Impulse and Doc had torn open his base while he was away, blocks littering the ground and water gushing in form the ocean floor. Mumbo had wept at the foot of his bed, begging for the ore.

Grian hadn’t gave in. 

They screamed at him, hurt him and threatened to disown him, but Grian knew the pain of their words was worth it. They would go back to normal if they weren’t around it, and it was worth all the risk. He hadn’t seen anyone in a few days, and he hoped it was because they had given up.

An itch tickled his throat, and Grian held his breath, hoping it would go away. If he coughed he wouldn’t stop, then he’d throw up which would make him dizzy and make him cough more. He hated this illness. 

“Grian?” A voice called out, sounding worried. “Are you here?”

Grian tried to keep quiet. He was so, _so_ tired and he didn’t know if he could take anymore interrogating from his friends. 

“It’s Scar, are you here?” Scar called out. “I haven’t seen you in a while, are you okay?”

Grian choked on his breath, and the damn cough started. It racked his lungs and Grian bent over at the waist, shoving his head in-between his knees to try and steady his dizzy head. 

“You’re sick,” Scar said, and Grian felt a calloused hand rub his back. He hadn’t felt a gentle touch in a long time, and tears flooded his eyes. The coughing didn’t stop. Naseua swirled in his stomach, becoming more violent with every cough.

“B-bucket,” Grian choked out, and Scar obediently grabbed it from the floor beside his bed. Grian grabbed it, his coughs subsiding enough for him to vomit. It was nothing but bile and redstone. Grian couldn’t remember the last time he’d eaten.

“Jesus Christ,” Scar said, pushing Grian’s sweaty bangs from his forhead. “You’re _really_ sick.”

Grian spit into the bucket, all but collapsing into Scar. The builder adjusted himself to accommodate Grian’s weight.

“I’m not.. not gonna tell you... where it is…” Grian muttered, breathless. He closed his eyes, he was so damn _tired_. He felt Scar move the bucket back to the floor.

“Is that _redstone?”_ Scar asked, worry apparent in his voice. “In your vomit?”

Grian nodded. 

“Shit,” Scar said. “Grian, how much do you have?” 

“Not… telling….”

“Grian, it was a bug. We burnt all the bad redstone. We need to burn yours too if you want to get better.” Scar murmured, running a hand through Grian’s hair and wiping some bile from his chin. 

Grian wanted to believe him so bad. He chose not to answer instead. He was so tired. It would be so easy to sleep and just not wake up again.

“Grian?” He heard another voice call out. “Grian??”  
  


“We’re in here!” Scar called out. 

“I’m dizzy.” Grian muttered. His eyes were closed but the room still spun. He felt light headed and sick. “I might pass out.” 

“Please don’t,” Scar said, sounding terrified. “ISKALL! HURRY!”

Grian heard someone land nearby and a curse. 

  
“Oh my god,” Iskall said, and Grian involuntarily winced, remembering what happened the last time Iskall had stopped by.

“He’s badly off,” Scar said, panic in his voice. 

“Yeah, he is. Grian, can you look at me?” Iskall asked, voice soft. His voice hadn’t been soft in a long time, and Grian made an effort to turn his head to look at his friend. The movement made him dizzy, and Grian felt consciousness slip away.

\--

He woke up without a cough in his throat.

Grian hadn’t felt that in a long time. It was amazing.

His head still hurt, but he no longer felt as sick as before. He could breathe and he felt more coherent. What changed?

“Grian? Are you awake?” Mumbo’s voice floated into his attention.

“Hm?” Grian hummed, turning his head to the side and looking at his friend. No tears.

“Oh, thank goodness!” Mumbo sighed and smiled. “You’ve been out for a few days now. We were worried sick.”

“What happened?” Grian murmured. 

“It was a bug with the new update,” Mumbo said, resting his hand on the back of Grian’s forehead. “Redstone made folks go wack. We burned all of it, and the new update returned it to it’s original state.”

“Go wack…?” Grian asked, frowning.

“Yeah,” Mumbo said with a breathless laugh. “Made me get super sobby, Iskall went flat out insane, Xisuma just didn’t care and it made you very, _very_ sick. You had tons of the stuff, dude.”

“I was saving you from it.” Grian said, trying to wrap his head around the scenario. 

“You did good,” A new voice said. Grian turned his head to see Iskall standing at the doorway, holding a bowl of soup. “The redstone exposure dropped enough when you stole it that we could think clearly enough to see something was wrong.”

Iskall placed the bowl on the chest next to Grian’s bed, a sorrowful look coming over his face.

“Grian… I am so, _so_ sorry how I treated you.”

“It’s alright,” Grian said. “You weren’t yourself. I’m just glad everything is back to normal.”

“Me too,” Mumbo laughed, and Iskall smiled in agreement.

Grian smiled, knowing that the worst was behind him and it could only get better from here.


End file.
